Judgment is a way that we use to try and create connections. Most people feel that there is safety in sameness and seek others that are similar to themselves. Most of what we call connection is actually based on judgment.
People who are different are often judged as being wrong or bad.
When we judge someone, that creates separation. Your judgment doesn’t make you right about your beliefs, they are just different. When we drop the judgment, we can observe a person more impartially. When you don’t make them wrong or bad, you don’t create that separation and can observe without trying to make them change. Even if they are being an ass-hat, you are able to remain curious and see their orientation to life and observe how they behave in the world. You don’t feel the need to try and change them when you don’t have judgment, you have allowance for who they are. Allowance is the lube to change and the antidote to judgment.
Do you ask for judgment?
When you are constantly seeking validation from others, you are not trusting yourself to know what is right for you. If you trust yourself, you aren’t as invested in what others are being or doing. and you aren’t trying to change yourself or change what others do. You aren’t trying to validate your self worth by asking for external judgment.
If you try to buy into someone else’s version of how to be or what to do in your life, you aren’t living in your aliveness.
Our relationship with aliveness is based a lot on our orientation to life and if you’re oriented toward judgment, you’re creating a reality of right and wrong, good and bad; a reality of separation. Say no to judgment and say yes to aliveness. You will be happy that you did.
This post has been infused with the energy of Seducing Aliveness, where two inspiring hosts reveal some controversial ideas.